Zoom Autism Magazine Summer 2015 (Issue 4) | Page 40

themselves, no matter how much they try, they inevitably grow up to be just like their parents. If you allow your child to spend time with a video game, or social media or anything else on the Internet and walk away, you have to face the fact that someone else, anyone else, is teaching your child how to behave online, and that behavior can be totally separate from their behavior offline. For example, when communicating in person, a child may continue to say “please” and “thank you,” but once he is back on the keyboard, the swear words fly and he starts tearing other people down. computers and learning the Internet can be hugely beneficial as technology keeps evolving at an exponential rate, but it has to be done safely. BE INVOLVED once those children become comfortable and relaxed, they often turn into the bullies that they once feared and hated. They begin to bully the other children and even say some truly hurtful things to people who have been nothing but kind to them. Above all else, just be there with your child to explain what is acceptable and what is not. Be there to tell your child that the things that a bully says aren’t true and that it is okay to find a better place to play. “If you allow your child to spend time with a video game, or social media or anything else on the Internet and walk away, you have to face the fact that someone else, anyone else, is teaching your child how to behave online.” This is known as “learned behaviors” and is often associated with children who grow up in an abusive home. Even though those children hate it and promise to never be abusive parents You need to be there. All of the technology in the world won’t matter unless you are by your child’s side. You may have done a terrific job of raising your child and instilling proper values and morals, but once your child signs on to the Internet, if it’s not you showing them how to behave there, it will be someone else. If you are the type of person that is inclined to say “I don’t get this stuff” or “I’ll never understand how that works,” then for the sake of your child, please try anyway. Take the time, do the research and make the effort. No one else will do that for you, and there is no program that will make the Internet safe either. Don’t listen to the articles or advertisements that tell you that a few simple steps will make everything better because it won’t. Your presence and involvement is the best course of action. Keeping your children away from the Internet is also not a good alternative as this will only hinder their ability to be prepared for the future. Every moment that can be put towards learning 42 ZOOM Autism through Many Lenses FIND A SAFE PLACE The Internet doesn’t have to be a scary place, not for you and not for your child either. Seek out safe places to visit via word of mouth, whether it is from autism support groups, your child’s therapists or other parents. Ask them if they know of any good places to get started online. Find closed groups, “whitelisted” video games and forums where only approved people can gain access. Leave any place that has bad language or allows questionable behaviors. No matter how unlikely it may seem, there are always alternative, and better, places to go. You don’t have the luxury of being at your child’s side all day at school or on the bus or at the playground, but you can be present at the computer. Don’t take that for granted. Autcraft, which was created by Stuart Duncan, is a whitelisted Minecraft server for children (and adults) who have autism and their families. What this means is that if you or a family member has autism and you own the computer version of Minecraft, you can register and apply to be put on the whitelist and play with other people just like you. A few features of Autcraft: Bullying, killing, stealing, griefing, etc. is not tolerated. Swearing is not tolerated. An in-game ticket/support system is in effect. If you need an admin to do something, stand where you need the help and use /modreq . Players’ builds are protected using World Guard. Ask an admin for protection. All kills, blocks placed, blocks broken, items dropped, picked up and more are tracked so that administrators can see exactly what happens anywhere. Stuart Duncan is the father of two boys, one with autism and one without. Stuart himself has Asperger’s Syndrome and has been writing blogs and articles for various autism charities since early 2010. He is the founder of Autcraft, the first Minecraft server for children with autism and their families. A few mini-games such as hide and seek, mob arena, and spleef are included. Community Wither fights and other events are promoted. For more information or to apply to be put on the whitelist, visit the Autcraft website. (NOTE: Due to recent increased interest, wait time for assessment of applications is approximately two week s.) ZOOM Autism through Many Lenses 43