When my grandfather died in 2009, his gardening wisdom died with him. Six years later, I find myself covered in dirt at the end of each day, wondering if I’m making him proud.
Every Sunday of my childhood our family would gather at Daddy’s house after church to eat his garden’s yield: tomatoes, squash, okra, beans. Some of my earliest memories are sitting at his kitchen counter snapping beans and shelling peas. I remember his giant, weathered hands delicately peeling peaches for my grandmother to freeze. One of 12 children, Daddy grew up in Portia, Ark., and often drove us to buy peaches from roadside stands there or watermelons in Cave City.
He simply loved good produce.
These memories, and others, fueled my desire to learn about his green thumb. As a
child I once saw the man put a stick in the ground that many years later grew into a tree. I thought he had a superpower. I later learned the mystery of soil, seed and water. And after many years working in the Arkansas Delta, witnessing poverty and hunger amidst some of the most fertile soil on the planet, I wondered how we got so much, so wrong.
Could I, too, have this superpower that my grandfather had? And could I learn to use it for good?
These questions brought me to WWOOF—World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms—an organization that connects farms and potential farmers, such as myself. Finding a farm is akin to online dating—a profile, a search engine, certain qualities you’re seeking. Much like finding a mate, it can be a crapshoot. WWOOF also seems to be the best new way for young folks to travel (and scare their parents). And while I’d heard good and bad stories, I never imagined I’d find a farm like Lucky Star in Rush, Ark.
Growing up in the flatlands of northeast Arkansas, I always longed for the hills on the other side of the Black River. I moved to those hills, 14 miles south of Yellville, and joined the Lucky Star family in February. Lucky Star is a 200-acre permaculture homestead with goats, chickens, ducks, guineas and countless fruits and vegetables. It is heavenly, sitting only a few miles from the Buffalo National River.
Farming is learning a new pace of life. It’s fast, furious, slow and steady. Each day is full of work and days often blend together. “Is this Tuesday? No, it’s Thursday,” is a common conversation you have with yourself. As an apprentice of sorts, I’ve gained firsthand experience starting seeds, taking care of animals, planting, weeding, building, and, most importantly, eating.
I haven’t tasted a tomato this good since my grandfather was alive. Each time I fix a cucumber and tomato sandwich I think of him and his rows and tomatoes growing in his backyard. The long list of gardening questions I would ask him are slowly being answered one-by-one during my time at Lucky Star. The owners, David and Donna, are patient, intelligent, resourceful growers who graciously impart their wisdom to me. While our days can be long and hot, our meals are first class. We gather around an old farm table for dinner each evening to swap wisdom, recipes and dreams.
While my dream of becoming a farmer seems daunting some days—okay, most days—I am encouraged by my family’s response to the produce I’ve shared. Tomatoes I started from seed, transplanted, planted in the garden soil, mulched, weeded, and truly loved. My family has long compared me to my grandpa, but living and learning at Lucky Star connects me to him in a way I never anticipated. As I reap and sow, I consider what he would think of my dreams, of WWOOF, of organic farming, of using this superpower for good.
And then, I eat a tomato from the garden, and I know how proud he is of me.
Musings of an Ozark WWOOFer
by Catherine Bahn
Cat and her dog, Fancy
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of The Recovery Tradition:
MADE A DECISION TO TURN OUR WILL AND OUR LIVES OVER TO THE CARE OF GOD AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM.
First, don’t let the usage ‘him’ be the end before you even begin. AA is not concerned with the face – or lack thereof – of God for you. It is only concerned with your opening to a power greater than yourself. The ‘as we understood him’ admits from the get-go that your higher power now will certainly evolve and change over time, and that is not a problem.
The Yoga Tradition takes the same view. The word for God is Ishvara, and Ishvara is neuter. This is important to understand because the tradition is not concerned with dictating a particular form for God. What is important about Ishvara to the yogi is that “his” actions do not originate in ignorance (avidya).
The third step is a culmination and integration of the first two: we begin to accept that our life is unmanageable and that we have no control over it, that we don’t actually see reality as it is, which is a form of insanity. From this perspective the only action that is clear is complete surrender.
As long as I think I have power, I have personalized action and intent. There is a sense of “I” that is forever strategizing and manipulating to get more of what it likes and desires – which is pleasure – and to avoid that which it does not like, which is pain. Until it is realized that in spite all of my efforts I cannot control the way things go, then I cannot let go. And letting go of personalized effort is surrender.
Yoga practice in its whole form invites deep relaxation into present awareness, into exactly what is happening in any given moment. This surrendering into the present flow of reality allows each moment to be just as it is, free from mental projections and identifications.
“Yoga is surrender (nirodah) of the projections (vrtti) of the mind (chitta), then the true nature of the self can manifest. Otherwise there’s identification (sarupyam) with mental projection.”
Yoga Sutras, I-II
To be free is what all human’s (and in particular spiritual seekers) desire; spiritual freedom means to be free from the bondage of the separate, isolated sense of self. An addict knows this isolation better than anyone; and her experience of separation is continuously strengthened by unquestioned thoughts that become habitual patterns of behavior, generating a feedback loop of unfulfilled seeking. The question now is, to what degree does this relate to you?
For the addict as well as for the Yogi surrendering to a Higher Power is an act of aligning with a source greater than you. That power becomes your compass for navigating personal experience and trusting the perfection of each moment. In the state of surrender we begin to learn how to act in a way that is free from habit. When our actions are free from habit they do not generate unfinished business or undigested experience (karmic repercussions).
The recovery program offers a prayer to embody the 3rd step: God I offer myself to you (nirodah – surrender) to do with me as you will. Relieve me of the bondage of self (chitta vritti – projections of the mind) that I may better do thy will. Take away my difficulties (sarupyam – identifications) that my transcendence over them may bear witness to your love, to your power (shakti – divine flow), and to your way of life. May I do your will always (Yoga – union).
Holly Krepps
Co-Owner of Circle Yoga Shala
Photo credit: Jess Gallegos, 500RYT and Photographer
STEP3
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