insideKENT Magazine Issue 24 - March 2014 | Page 116

GETAWAYS

THE UNRIVALLED

Who'd A Thought It
When you think of a country hotel in the heart of rural Kent, Jacuzzis, fur throws and Cristal aren't the first
things that spring to mind – but that doesn't mean it can't happen, right? Because in fact it has happened.
Yes, Who'd A Thought It offers its services as a Champagne and Oyster Bar with Rooms, respectively taking
the title of the AA's Funkiest Rooms of the Year. Aptly, when it comes to this one-of-a-kind destination, think
outside of the box and you may still not be there. It's unique, it's exciting and it's right here under our nose.
At Who'd A Thought It, expect the unexpected. BY GEMMA DUNN

Located in Grafty Green, this Kent-based hotel
surpasses expectations by offering something a
little out of the ordinary. Here, owner Joe Mallet
prides himself on offering guests unrivalled
individuality, hand-in-hand with an
uncompromising service; and in the main part,
a unique sleeping experience. Having heard so
much about these offerings, I was only too
pleased to try them out for myself.
Upon arrival, just how rural the hotel is
became apparent – thus shedding light on the
'Who'd A Thought It' namesake. Perfect for a
secluded, relaxing break, this is not just
somewhere for the locals, but a destination that
many travel to from further afield; and just why
became clear when we were shown to our room.
Residing in the latest addition to the Who'd
A Thought It luxury suites, the Roederer Cristal
Room is a magical celebration of the Art Deco
era. Boasting rich blue, green and gold hues, the
impressive design incorporates the traditional
visual arts and style of the bygone era, yet with
sumptuous interiors and modern day amenities.
While dazzling glass furnishings meet decadent
artwork and fur rugs, the spacious room also
affords a lounge seating area, deluxe bed and
open-plan bathroom, complete with a large hot
tub bath.
In addition to the opulent interior, Who'd A
Thought It resolves to offer guests every comfort
during their stay, with well-appointed amenities
such as fluffy bathrobes, tea and coffee making
facilities, complimentary water, chocolate and
luxurious toiletries. What's more, the latest Sonos

music system, 42" 3D TV, large private patio and
underfloor heating certainly didn't go amiss!
Much like the other 10 rooms on site, the
hotel’s fantasy-evoking design is testament to
what you can achieve when you give free reign
to the imagination. Having stayed here, it's evident
to see that's just what it's all about at Who'd A
Thought It – escapism and a celebration of
freedom from the mundane.
Another room which champions this ethos
is the new Dom Ruinart Suite. As unique as it is
stunning, this extraordinary room hous