IN Mt. Lebanon Winter 2016 | Page 11

INDUSTRY INSIGHT DIVORCE AND FAMILY LAW SPONSORED CONTENT How to Help Your Children With a SEPARATION C hildren are impacted in many ways by a separation/divorce. Because of this, we offer some points to keep in mind.. 1. 2. You should make an extra effort to get along, especially when children are present. You should strive to make amicability a priority. You should not share adult information with your children. You should be honest when answering questions, but that does not include sharing details about your litigation. 3. You should never speak negatively about the other parent to your children. 4. You should not look for emotional support from your children. That is best provided by friends, clergy or therapists. 5. When you spend 1-1 time with your children, really listen to them and give them an opportunity to share their feelings. Pay attention to verbal or physical cues. Consider whether professional help is appropriate. 6. Allow your children to express themselves freely to you. Listen, and validate their feelings so they know you understand what you are hearing. Give your children reassurance. 7. Try to maintain as much stability as possible, and avoid unnecessary changes. Most children do better with predictability and routine. If possible, wait a while before making big changes to their lives. 8. Stay emotionally connected with your children during the process. Be involved in the details of their lives. 9. Do not use your children as a “messenger.” Communicate directly with the other parent. 12. Don’t ask your children to choose with whom they want to live. 13. Focus on strengthening your relationship with the children. Don’t try to buy their affection with gifts. 14. Always take the high road. You are a role model for your children. Contact us at www.smgglaw.com or 412.281.5423. 10. If possible, talk together with the children about the separation. Address together the anticipated changes that will occur. 11. Reassure your children that they are not the cause of the separation. Mt. Lebanon | Winter 2016 | icmags.com 9