Getting Comfortable with
“The Talk”
|by Kelly Bartlett
It’s never too early to begin talking with your
kids about sex. In fact, the earlier you start, the
more comfortable you will feel when it’s time to
talk about difficult issues. Here are some ageappropriate topics parents should bring up with
their children now to pave the way for lessstressful conversations about sexual health in
the adolescent years.
Ages 0-2: Positive Perception
There’s no better time to start practicing the language of body talk than when kids are infants.
At this age, there’s no pressure to say the “right”
thing, and your baby won’t laugh, get nervous,
or ask any questions. It’s important to get comfortable verbalizing words or bodily functions
that may cause some discomfort for you.
According to Dr. Laura Berman, a sex educator,
therapist, and author of Talking to Your Kids
About Sex, something crucial for parents to do
while their kids are infants is to adopt a positive
view of bodily functions. Shift from looking at a
poopy diaper as, “Oh, isn’t that stinky!” to a perspective of, “Wow, you’ve been eating well!” Dr.
Berman says many parents have likely learned
from their own upbringing to feel ashamed or
embarrassed of bowel movements. “When really,” she says, “it’s just a part of life!” Functions
involving the genitals are healthy and normal,
not something negative or problematic.
Ages 2-3: Touching & Being
Touched
Children will inevitably discover their genitals,
and when this happens, it’s time to start the conversations about touching. Normalize self-touch
by not reacting strongly to your toddler playing
with his genitals. Instead, just let him know that
there are appropriate times and places to do so.
If it happens at an inappropriate time, Dr. Berman advises parents, “Explain that while it feels
good to touch your private parts, they are your
private parts and this touching should only occur in privat R