guidance she has the integrity to give me advice based on biblical principles and / or encourage me to ask someone with the knowledge and expertise that I am seeking .
Truth and accountability are essential to any godly relationship . In a world where truth is believed to be relative , we should remember that Jesus is the way , the TRUTH , and the life . His word is the truth and the standard for our lives , including relationships . In a godly relationship we must be willing to speak the truth even when the truth is uncomfortable . This is difficult for me because I hate confrontation , I don ’ t like to rock the boat , and I don ’ t like to make other feel uncomfortable . The irony is that , as a Christian , we should be uncomfortable when don ’ t speak the truth . I have begun to realize that I would rather make someone uncomfortable than loose the opportunity to speak truth in love .
Jesus tells us in John 8:31-32 that when we abide in His word , then we are His disciples , and then we will know the truth and the truth will set us free . In a godly relationship , we choose to speak truth because we more are concerned with someone ’ s freedom than we are our own comfort . In a godly relationship we also learn how to communicate the truth in love . Meaning that we speak truth because we genuinely care , not because we want to win an argument or feel superior .
Speaking truth opens the door for accountability . Few people list accountability as something they are looking for in a relationship , yet accountability is incorporated into godly relationships . Google defines accountable as being required or expected to explain or justify ones actions . Why does this matter in a godly relationship ? Because in a godly relationship our heart is for the other person to grow in Christ . Thus it should not be unusual to ask questions , not for the sake of being nosey , but for the purpose of encouraging growth and intimacy with Jesus .
This does not entail an interrogation . Instead , it is having honest conversations about time with God , goals , plans , the bible , and challenges . It is praying with one another and encouraging each other to pursue God . Accountability may not sound fun , however accountability produces the desired results that we would otherwise not obtain on our own .
Godly relationships are a blessing and should be cherished . We often appreciate godly relationships most , after we have experienced a toxic relationship . Toxic relationships are relationships that constantly drain us mentally and emotionally and they leave us feeling used . Toxic relationships are often codependent and the two people in the relationship likely lack ( or reject ) wise input or counsel from others .
A friend of mine describes relationships like a bank account . A person can give to the bank account and take from the bank account . In an unhealthy relationship , there is only taking , which leaves the account depleted or overdrawn . This could be the person that only calls to tell you their woes , rarely asking how you are doing . This includes only making plans and that cater to their tastes , constantly requesting favors , and expecting you to be available whenever needed . Eventually you feel used and unappreciated . When we subject ourselves to such treatment we are operating in codependency .
WebMD explains codependency as a “ pattern of behavior in which you are dependent on approval from someone else for your selfworth and identify .” When we do not find our self-worth and identity in Christ , we search for it in others , and the cycle of codependency ensues as we ache for acceptance . We willingly do anything necessary to keep the other person happy , even forsaking our own values , because for the moment that person makes us feel wanted or valued .
Alas , there is always hope because we have God . When we truly submit to God and go to Him with our hearts , He is always there . We can boldly approach the throne of grace and ask Him to reveal His love for us in tangible ways . We can ask Him to show us who we are in Him . Jeremiah 33:3 says that we are to call to God and He will answer us and show us great and mighty things that we do not know . God is not silent . Jesus did not die on the cross so that he could NOT talk to us . He died on the cross to redeem our eternal relationship with Him . Therefore we can ask Him about anything including relationship advice . Every relationship is af-