ment can separate us from the Holy Spirit ’ s work in our lives . Because forgiveness is in God ’ s nature , when we don ’ t forgive we are not acting in His will . “ And when you stand praying , if you hold anything against anyone , forgive them , so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins ” ( Mark 11:25 ).
Please understand . Forgiveness is not forgetting . To forgive is not to allow the person to continue to abuse you . It is not a defenseless , weak response where we “ lay down and take it .” It is a decisive action that demands strength of character , perseverance , and patience .
We must learn , with God ’ s help , to separate the act of forgiveness from the emotion of the wronged events . This doesn ’ t make us more vulnerable : just the opposite . God will shield us if we give it over to Him to handle . He can turn the evil into something for our own good . He can protect us from the verbal arrows slung toward us , as was my case , and help us develop a peace despite the actions of others . No longer are we controlled by their words , moods or actions . That distancing can help us gain a new perspective , and see the situation though His eyes , objectively and , yes , eventually through agape love . It ’ s up to each of us to decide . Do we choose to separate ourselves from the emotion surrounding the offense or separate ourselves from God ’ s healing power ? Until we surrender the anger and hurt to Him to handle for us , the wall will keep building , imprisoning us in our pain . We cannot open our hearts to receive His forgiveness until we open ourselves to the possibility of forgiving others . And if you still think you can ’ t , ask God to help you get to that point . Trust me , eventually He will .